Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Bikini Wax Trauma

I should've waited until Roza got back from vacation.

I consider myself to be a veteran of waxing of any kind since I've been doing it since I was a teenager. I've seen many estheticians over my years of waxing and have yet to cry or yelp out loud.

Normally, I only see Roza for these delicate matters, but Alex and I are going to the inlaws for a few days and they have a pool. So, when I called to book my appointment and found out Roza was away, I settled for getting someone else to do it. Some person I'd never heard of who was new.

I tried to be optimistic, but wasn't exactly a confidence builder when newbie started talking to herself under her breath going, "Oops! Oh, that didn't work. Hmm... what if I try it this way?"

She yanked and pulled from every direction, digging her sharp fingernails here and there on my raw sensitive skin (which was excruciating - not to mention unsanitary), using my woohoo as leverage to yank the strips away. It's the first time I almost screamed during a wax. I got the feeling she was ready to cry as well since it wasn't going very well from her end. She got so much wax caked on one spot that it wouldn't come off, so she started dabbing kleenex on it (an excellent idea putting wax and tissue together) and of course none of it came off. So she proceeded to gloop by the handful, some miscellaneous post-wax lotion that is supposed to get rid of any wax residue as she scratched with her nails on that raw sensitive wax and tissue covered patch to get it off. Simultaneously, to my horror, I felt an intense burning sensation in another area - an area that needs no introduction.

I begged her to stop what she was doing so I could go to the bathroom and wash everything off. She didn't understand and added another blob of this mystery lotion. "Here, this will help!" I tried my best to explain that this lotion had found its way inside and I needed to take care of it. Pronto. She offered me the lotion again insisting it was the only solution. I grabbed my skirt and ran to the bathroom.

I'm home now covered in teatree oil feeling much relieved.

Never again.

4 comments:

Claire said...

Ouch!! I can't even imagine! This is why I rely on home jobbies, so the only idiot I have to blame for a wax gone amok is myself (yes, I realize this is of little consolation!). Hope you're feeling better now!

Ali Kat said...

Is it bad that I'm smiling (and maybe even giggling a little)? Sorry about your misfortunes :(

degsies said...

i'm laughing out loud! reasons to avoid wax...

geekigirl said...

i hope you reported that hack to the management. that's brutal.